HBP in Verse

2005.

Fudge was always an idiot
He rocks up to the tune of a portrait
Complaining about what he got
The new minister is a little late.

Cissy and Bella out for a walk
Off to see dear Severus, the fake,
Cissy really wants to spill and talk
She wants him to save Drake.

Harry snoring by the window
Dumbie appears and makes some noise
The Dursleys, shocked, watch them go
Man this Horace has no poise.

Safe and snug at the Burrow
OWLs and Quidditch Captain
All want to kill Fleur before tomorrow
Follow Draco to B & B – he goes in.

They jump on that locomotive
Harry is stupid and plays spy
Malfoy is cruel after sharing his motive
Stupid spy left bloody with wide eye.

Snape is DADA, Horace is Potions
This doesn’t seem at all sage.
We go through all the schooly motions
Harry learns things from HBP’s page.

Memories in Dumbie’s hours
Quidditch and bad play
Ron and Hermione’s relationship sours
Harry follows Drake all day.

What about poor Ron?
Or should I say Won Won?
Then Harry and Ginny shared a kiss
Hear those H/Hr shippers hiss.

We’re on the trail of spirit things
Snape and Malfoy look a little suss
Apparating is faster than wings
Dumbie and Harry involved in a fuss.

The undead being such a blast
Dumbie is in such a bad state
Harry gets him out fast -
Woo! It’s war with those we hate!

We all knew Snape was an evil git
What gets us is that Dumbie knew squat
He also didn’t expect that Avada hit
He drank that foul stuff and for what?

The Death Eaters leave
With Snape (who is the HBP)
Leaving good guys to breathe
Dead Dumbie for all to see.

Now Harry wants to hit back
He is giving school the flick
He’ll watch Fleur in that wedding sack
Then do something thick.