You Were Never Like This
Chapter 4 - Full Moon and Some Quidditch
Written 2003

A couple of weeks had passed since Remus had told Harry and the days seemed to drag on endlessly. Remus could tell he was gaining respect once more, but he knew it would take time until they fully trusted him as a teacher. He'd received loads of owls from parents, complaining about the safety of the classes. He'd answered them politely, but the following responses were rude.

And the thing that was really annoying Remus was that it was the day before full moon. He noticed that his students seemed more anxious than ever as the full moon approached, but at the time he'd laughed it off. But the the passage about werewolves from the Monster Book of Monsters began to really get to him and Remus wondered if he could change the text book given out.

As the sun set, Lupin dully drank the disgusting potion and sat back in the chair in his office, a bottle of brandy swinging in his hands. Before he knew it, he was downing the whole bottle absently. Remus tossed it aside when he'd finished and drew another one out of his desk, finishing this one much quicker. By then, his vision had become cloudy and his thoughts muzzy. Maybe the alcohol would numb it better...

Then he passed out.

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When he came to, it was morning and he couldn't remember what had happened at all the night before. He caught side of the empty brandy bottles and groaned, clutching his pounding head. But it seemed to have helped, which was the good thing. I should do that more often, Remus decided.

Then he realised what had woken him. Some one was banging on the door impatiently, not willing to stop. Lupin staggered over and yelled through, "I'm having the day off! Go away!"

He tried unsuccessfully to scare off whoever it was by growling.

"Oh grow up," he heard Shamari snap. "Let me in."

Remus sighed and opened the door a little bit. On the threshold stood Shamari Witherspoon, looking exhausted from lack of sleep. In her hands were notes and books for her classes. This surprised Lupin, who had quickly pulled on a dressing gown. He frowned. "You're teaching?"

Shamari tried to sound waspish but it was lost on Lupin. "Of course I am. If the students saw me taking days off at the same time as you were...geez, Remus, were you drinking last night?"

"And if I was?"

Shamari leant back, trying to avoid his breath. "You could have caused the potion to backfire or something."

Remus laughed. "Well it didn't! I don't remember a thing that happened last night."

"You disgust me," Shamari said, but without venom. "I came around to drop you some books to read if you wanted, seeings as you prefer to ditch class. You were never like this at school, were you?"

"I hope not."

She dropped the books onto a chair and stepped outside, her eyes tiredly averting his. Remus grinned at her in an embarrassed way. "I'm sorry you had to see me this way."

"Think nothing of it," Shamari said dryly. "I'll see you tomorrow for the Quidditch match, then?"

Remus allowed his grin to remain on his face. "If I don't have too much of a hangover."

Shamari looked back as she walked along the corridor. "You'd better not, werewolf."

Remus slept most of the morning, with few dreams. When he dragged himself out of bed at noon and into his study, he peeked out at the Care of Magical Creatures class who were barely listening to the substitute. Pleased that they listened more to him, Lupin toasted himself with something a little weaker - white wine. He realised he was hungry so went hunting through his drawers for some chocolate. He felt like indulging himself a little, seeings as Shamari had broken some of the ice.

For the rest of the afternoon, he read some of the books and decided he liked them. They were from a stack of unpopular books, but Remus found them to be excellent reading material. As the sun began to sink again, he got out the rest of his brandy and looked at each bottle greedily. Choosing two more, he put the rest back into his desk and began filling up again.

Like the night before, he passed out. It seemed this was going to become a monthly ritual.

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Pounding once again woke him on his door. Hurriedly, he threw on some clothes and a deep blue cloak, calling, "Hang on!"

Remus threw open the door to see Shamari adorned in lilac and tapping her foot impatiently. She was wearing a sequined hat and looking quite her usual waspish self. Without a word, she spun around and strode off, Remus hurrying to keep up with her. He saw this as an excellent way to forget what had happened in the past and get Shamari to forgive him.

They took seats with the rest of the teachers, overlooking the pitch at a modest view. The match was a friendly Ravenclaw verses Hufflepuff, so Remus relaxed a little. It wasn't going to be a dirty game. Shamari shot him an aggravated look. "I go to Quidditch for the social side of things. I guess you're into the sport."

"Uh, yes," Remus admitted.

Shamari made a disgusted sound and handed over her omnioculars. Still, it was a start. As the players zoomed out onto the pitch, Remus narrowed in on them, completely forgetting his troubles. He didn't notice the sudden smile spreading across Shamari's face as she saw years of burden lift from his shoulders. The game began with a rush of flying colours, including the balls whizzing back and forth.

To Shamari, it was just a social event. She hated the sport and hated the fact that everyone else loved it. She enjoyed talking with other people, strangers even, but she felt closed in at this match. There was really no one to talk to. Bored, she hunched her shoulders and stared sideways at Remus whose face seemed youthful as he watched the game.

Suddenly aware of being looked at, Lupin blushed slightly without anyone noticing. But he neither turned to talk to her nor kept his attention on the game. This resulted in being a bit uncomfortable, but all in all, not so embarrassing.