Sleeping Beauty
Chapter 2 - All Things Found
Written 2005-2009
There was something missing, something out of place. Teyla Emmagan could not discover it, even in her meditations. It had been some days since she had been declared healthy enough to return to her quarters, though it would be another few days before anyone allowed her to return to active duty. Leaning against the railing on one of Atlantis' many balconies, she calmly shifted through her thoughts to ascertain exactly where this feeling was coming from.
Down below, the ocean's roar had abated to a disquiet, to the point where she thought that perhaps someone had clapped their hands over her ears. The water was missing its voice and Teyla was missing...something. Just something.
Perhaps it was a side effect of the coma. Among the Athosians, there were those who fell into irreconcilable sleep, only sometimes waking. But in her memories, none had described lacking any part of themselves. Teyla wondered if some of her soul was still asleep. She knew the Earth medicine would never say such a thing, but she couldn't help but wonder.
She had meditated and walked, thought and walked some more. And now she had no option but to return to Earth science and its explanations.
Teyla walked to the infirmary through empty corridors, where even her footfalls failed to beak the soundless halls.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The infirmary was filled with soft noises – a distant murmur among staff, the steady hum of machines running hot with tests and the mutter of patients planning an escape. Teyla welcomed these sounds and paused at the doorway, breathing out one slow breath before crossing into this sanctuary.
Many of the doctors here she had to trust her life and body to. But there was only one she would trust with a matter of her mind and her soul.
She stood just outside his office, watching him lean over closer to the work on his desk, making the lab coat cinch tighter along his shoulders, which seemed broader and more built than she remembered. Although, more often she saw him in bulky off-world gear and less in what he felt comfortable.
“Doctor Beckett, I wish to speak with you,” she spoke quietly, not wanting to startle him.
“Teyla,” he said gruffly, keeping his back to her.
Surprised at his reluctance, though accepting it as part of possible exhaustion, Teyla linked her fingers in front of her briefly, before dropping her hands to her sides. She asked, “Are there any side effects of being in a coma that I should be aware of?”
Carson turned in the chair, concern flitting into his blue eyes. “Is something wrong, love?”
“I have been feeling...strange,” Teyla explained. “It is unusual for me to feel as though I have misplaced anything, but there is something missing.”
His expression became neutrally blank. If not for how he clenched the material of his pants of his knees, Teyla would think that he thought very little of her visit. She read his anxiety in the small lines deepening between his eyes and the restless movement of his feet. Finally, he said dismissively, “Perhaps you should talk to Dr Heightmeyer.”
Teyla stared at him, again letting out a slow breath but this time to control her confusion and anger. Whenever she had come to talk to Carson, he had been warm and caring. This time he was treating her no differently than a new marine. It did make her angry, but she could not dwell on it. Perhaps there was something bothering him as well. And yet, it hurt.
“Very well,” she said. “If you will not take the time to listen to a friend, I will find alternative means to be heard.”
She caught the stricken look on his face out of the corner of her eye as she turned back to the door. As she left, Teyla thought she heard a soft apology leave his lips, but it may have only been a whisper from her own mind.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Teyla did not seek Dr Heightmeyer. She had no patience for talking herself into circles, though she did not realise how little patience she had until she sat on the floor of her quarters to meditate. There were many distractions. A candle blew itself out – she had to relight it. The chill of the darkening ocean's surface gushed in through a window – she shut it. Her limbs began to ache and she chided herself for failing to do something even Athosian children accomplished with ease.
“Breathe,” she told herself.
Teyla breathed and tried to settle her mind, but on her closed eyelids she saw Carson's face. She should not have spoken to him that way. But he should not have ignored her.
Carson. What did she think of him? She was not sure, but she thought of him often. His kind, gentle nature. His warm hands on her skin, a caress, and then...the kiss.
She opened her eyes and frowned into the darkness. Never could she recall kissing Dr Beckett. Never had she considered it. And yet...Teyla breathed deeply, focusing more and more on her impressions of him. His lips had touched hers, she could feel it. His short behaviour with her made more sense. And she had heard that he and Lieutenant Cadman were merely friends now.
Teyla lifted her fingers to rest over her lips. She felt the curve of a smile.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Carson.”
The doctor stopped in his tracks, hands full of bandages and other supplies. He moved to face her, concern and chagrin mixing on his face. Setting down his armful, Carson seemed to be trying to sound casual, though he did not meet her eyes when he said, “Yes, love? Are you feeling better?”
“I am,” Teyla answered hesitantly. “I need to speak to you about when I woke up.”
“I've got patients...”
She held up both hands. “Listen to me. I want to know why you kissed me.”
“I was hoping you wouldn't remember that,” he admitted ruefully.
“Answer me.”
Carson shifted under her gaze, but did not turn away. His eyes lifted to hers and their depths surprised Teyla, drawing her closer to him. He murmured, “I...honestly don't know, Teyla.”
“I think you do,” Teyla said, now standing just two paces from him. “The nurses told me you were by my side all the hours I was asleep.”
“I'm a doctor. I can worry about my patients, can't I...?”
She stepped closer and rested her hands on his shoulders, bowing her head. Slightly disconcerted, Carson returned the gesture. Teyla felt the secure weight of his hands, felt the warmth of his body so close to hers. Gazing into his eyes, she smiled. “I would like you to kiss me again.”
As his kiss touched her and filled her with the indescribable warmth of Carson, she closed her eyes and leaned into his chest. This was where she belonged. She was complete. All things found.
Carson whispered against her lips, “I'm so glad you asked.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Between missions and emergencies, there were so few of those quiet moments. But this morning was one of those. With the dawn came streaks of pink and orange, darting across the sky on their journey into the opposite horizon. Two figures, one silhouette, were watching from a balcony still hidden in the fading shadow of night.
Teyla leaned back, tilting her head up to smile at her partner. Carson returned the smile, gently kissing her forehead before turning his attention to her lips.
As the air around them began to brighten, he pulled back.
“I'm going to tell you a story,” he said. “A story about a lass that many call a Sleeping Beauty...”
Down below, the ocean's roar had abated to a disquiet, to the point where she thought that perhaps someone had clapped their hands over her ears. The water was missing its voice and Teyla was missing...something. Just something.
Perhaps it was a side effect of the coma. Among the Athosians, there were those who fell into irreconcilable sleep, only sometimes waking. But in her memories, none had described lacking any part of themselves. Teyla wondered if some of her soul was still asleep. She knew the Earth medicine would never say such a thing, but she couldn't help but wonder.
She had meditated and walked, thought and walked some more. And now she had no option but to return to Earth science and its explanations.
Teyla walked to the infirmary through empty corridors, where even her footfalls failed to beak the soundless halls.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The infirmary was filled with soft noises – a distant murmur among staff, the steady hum of machines running hot with tests and the mutter of patients planning an escape. Teyla welcomed these sounds and paused at the doorway, breathing out one slow breath before crossing into this sanctuary.
Many of the doctors here she had to trust her life and body to. But there was only one she would trust with a matter of her mind and her soul.
She stood just outside his office, watching him lean over closer to the work on his desk, making the lab coat cinch tighter along his shoulders, which seemed broader and more built than she remembered. Although, more often she saw him in bulky off-world gear and less in what he felt comfortable.
“Doctor Beckett, I wish to speak with you,” she spoke quietly, not wanting to startle him.
“Teyla,” he said gruffly, keeping his back to her.
Surprised at his reluctance, though accepting it as part of possible exhaustion, Teyla linked her fingers in front of her briefly, before dropping her hands to her sides. She asked, “Are there any side effects of being in a coma that I should be aware of?”
Carson turned in the chair, concern flitting into his blue eyes. “Is something wrong, love?”
“I have been feeling...strange,” Teyla explained. “It is unusual for me to feel as though I have misplaced anything, but there is something missing.”
His expression became neutrally blank. If not for how he clenched the material of his pants of his knees, Teyla would think that he thought very little of her visit. She read his anxiety in the small lines deepening between his eyes and the restless movement of his feet. Finally, he said dismissively, “Perhaps you should talk to Dr Heightmeyer.”
Teyla stared at him, again letting out a slow breath but this time to control her confusion and anger. Whenever she had come to talk to Carson, he had been warm and caring. This time he was treating her no differently than a new marine. It did make her angry, but she could not dwell on it. Perhaps there was something bothering him as well. And yet, it hurt.
“Very well,” she said. “If you will not take the time to listen to a friend, I will find alternative means to be heard.”
She caught the stricken look on his face out of the corner of her eye as she turned back to the door. As she left, Teyla thought she heard a soft apology leave his lips, but it may have only been a whisper from her own mind.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Teyla did not seek Dr Heightmeyer. She had no patience for talking herself into circles, though she did not realise how little patience she had until she sat on the floor of her quarters to meditate. There were many distractions. A candle blew itself out – she had to relight it. The chill of the darkening ocean's surface gushed in through a window – she shut it. Her limbs began to ache and she chided herself for failing to do something even Athosian children accomplished with ease.
“Breathe,” she told herself.
Teyla breathed and tried to settle her mind, but on her closed eyelids she saw Carson's face. She should not have spoken to him that way. But he should not have ignored her.
Carson. What did she think of him? She was not sure, but she thought of him often. His kind, gentle nature. His warm hands on her skin, a caress, and then...the kiss.
She opened her eyes and frowned into the darkness. Never could she recall kissing Dr Beckett. Never had she considered it. And yet...Teyla breathed deeply, focusing more and more on her impressions of him. His lips had touched hers, she could feel it. His short behaviour with her made more sense. And she had heard that he and Lieutenant Cadman were merely friends now.
Teyla lifted her fingers to rest over her lips. She felt the curve of a smile.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Carson.”
The doctor stopped in his tracks, hands full of bandages and other supplies. He moved to face her, concern and chagrin mixing on his face. Setting down his armful, Carson seemed to be trying to sound casual, though he did not meet her eyes when he said, “Yes, love? Are you feeling better?”
“I am,” Teyla answered hesitantly. “I need to speak to you about when I woke up.”
“I've got patients...”
She held up both hands. “Listen to me. I want to know why you kissed me.”
“I was hoping you wouldn't remember that,” he admitted ruefully.
“Answer me.”
Carson shifted under her gaze, but did not turn away. His eyes lifted to hers and their depths surprised Teyla, drawing her closer to him. He murmured, “I...honestly don't know, Teyla.”
“I think you do,” Teyla said, now standing just two paces from him. “The nurses told me you were by my side all the hours I was asleep.”
“I'm a doctor. I can worry about my patients, can't I...?”
She stepped closer and rested her hands on his shoulders, bowing her head. Slightly disconcerted, Carson returned the gesture. Teyla felt the secure weight of his hands, felt the warmth of his body so close to hers. Gazing into his eyes, she smiled. “I would like you to kiss me again.”
As his kiss touched her and filled her with the indescribable warmth of Carson, she closed her eyes and leaned into his chest. This was where she belonged. She was complete. All things found.
Carson whispered against her lips, “I'm so glad you asked.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Between missions and emergencies, there were so few of those quiet moments. But this morning was one of those. With the dawn came streaks of pink and orange, darting across the sky on their journey into the opposite horizon. Two figures, one silhouette, were watching from a balcony still hidden in the fading shadow of night.
Teyla leaned back, tilting her head up to smile at her partner. Carson returned the smile, gently kissing her forehead before turning his attention to her lips.
As the air around them began to brighten, he pulled back.
“I'm going to tell you a story,” he said. “A story about a lass that many call a Sleeping Beauty...”